Real Faith

EZEKIEL 36:26-27
I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh. And I will put my Spirit in you and move you to follow my decrees and be careful to keep my laws.

Love of The Savior

Hello Friends!

I am pleased to be writing to you in the midst of this holiday season! Let me take a moment to wish you...MERRY CHRISTMAS!

It is fitting that we celebrate Christmas before a new year begins, because as I am reminded of His birth and my initial salvation, I am also reminded of His continued love and hand over my life. Each year, through every joy and every pain I know that my Lord is drawing me closer to Him. This year has been amazing, and I want to share some of the things God has shown me:

1) How and why to love people beyond my own capabilities.
2) The importance of community that is loving, encouraging, seeking
Christ together and sharing Christ together.
3) How to be vulnerable, even when it hurts.
4) That He TRULY is sufficient to meet EVERY need, every day.
5) Temporal things satisfy me less and less, but I have never left
His presence unsatisfied.
6) He has helped me to live more victoriously over sin than in previous seasons of my life.

This year I have been able to clearly see how He enables me to trust Him more and more. I am so privileged to know Jesus, and blessed to be a part of what He is doing here and in the nations (particularly Zambia). I have the honor to live the kind of life that is fully satisfying. I am trying not to take any breath or any day for granted.

Thank you for your continued support and prayers. I am so blessed to know so many beautiful people in my life. I have learned so much about life and love through my friends. Through everyone I encounter, God shapes me to be more of the person he created me to be! So, thank you, because without each of you I would not be in the place I am today!

Second Place

I took second prize for BEST COSTUME at Michelle and Joe's Annual Halloween Costume Party by dressing up as my boss' husband! It was beautiful.

The Cross

I don't know if anyone continues to read my blog since I returned home. Many times I feel like life here is not as exciting as it is in Zambia. But I would be wrong. The Lord is alive and active in my life here just as much as He is in Zambia, it just looks a little different.

This week, I have wrestled with the Lord. I mean really wrestled...with anger, forgiveness, sadness, anxiety... and I have to tell you that I am constantly amazed by the grace and love that the Lord showers over me. I love that He ALWAYS leads me by His Spirit and His word.

God has been rocking my world for about 6 months now. In preparation for Zambia I felt joy, anticipation and encouragement. In Zambia I felt utter joy, challenge, frustration, a great spirit of encouragement. Upon my arrival home I felt sadness, renewed strength, a new desire for the Lord, but quite disappointed to be home. In relationships I have felt encouraged, loved, broken, hurt, desired, helped and helpless. For the future, I lack understanding and vision at the moment which leaves me feeing confused and sometimes frustrated.

I know that some of you may be thinking that this is discouraging, but through these experiences the Lord continually brings me back to the foot of the cross where He brings me to a place of submission. And in my own stubbornness and obstinance, still chooses to rain down his love and mercy upon me. As I look back on the amazing work the Lord has done in my life, I realize that every lesson I have learned in love and in life comes back to what Christ accomplished on the cross for me.

Nothing I do in life matters, if I don't do it for Christ. No journey I take will be successful without Christ, and praise Him for it! He desires me so much that He will continually remove obstacles in my life to draw me closer to Him, even if it brings me deep hurt. People have always said to me, "God's purposes are higher than our own, and His knowledge is infinite and beyond our understanding." Over the past two years, I have come to understand what that means, although I don't always understand why He works situations the way He does. But my understanding of how and why He works situations is not important, it is that I trust in Him and in His goodness towards me.

My prayer for all who read this is that you would experience Christ working in your life this way. That despite joy, disappointments, and all the other array of emotions or situations you may endure, that you could still look at Christ and wonder at His character. He is higher than your hopes, higher than your dreams, and that is a scary thing sometimes.

The more I realize that He is in control of my life, the more hope I have for the future, because He is the only thing/person worth hoping in. I am so thankful that when I look at my life, I can see how the Lord has prepared me for situations that He would bring me through, gave me healing and hope, has caused me to endure and has made me a better friend, lover, sister, daughter, co-worker, etc. I am looking forward to seeing what He has for me next.

Psalms 3:3-5
"But you are a shield around me, O Lord;
you bestow glory upon me and lift up my head.
To the Lord I cry aloud, and he answers me from his holy hill.
I lie down and sleep; I wake again, because he Lord sustains me."

Two Quotes of the Day

“The important thing is this: To be able at any moment to sacrifice what we are for what we could become.” - Charles Dubois

“The reason I’m attracted to the light of Scriptures is because there’s another side of me that is dark. The reason I’m interested in men of peace is because I’m not like them and would like to be. I’m not someone in real life who turns the other cheek. ”
Bono

Life As Usual (Or Not)

After an unexpectedly rough journey back to the States, I am now home in Austin and re-acclimating to life in the fast lane again. Although my heart longs to be in Zambia loving the children, the Lord has shown me an amazing amount of grace in being home. By that I mean, God is showing me all of the good things in my life in Austin that I have to be thankful for.

My brain still has alot of experiences to process left over from the summer. My time there was so busy, there has been a delay of the penetration of my experiences to my heart. There is so much that I learned this summer that it is somewhat overwhelming to begin praying through all of it.

One of the ways in which the Zambians live that impacted me the most was their since of community, and the joy they derive from it. They know one another well, they are able to support, encourage and correct one another with an equal amount of love.

Just being able to be there, to love those children and to teach them the Word of God gave me a deeper yearning to live my life with a pure heart. God has given us senses to take in His creation and to know Him, but those same senses have also been perverted by sin. Much of the information that I inhale each day is full of perversion, tv and magazines are particularly disruptive to my natural state of peace in the Lord. Let's just take a look at what one might find on any given day on the television or on the front of a magazine...dysfunctional marriages, sex, affairs, nudity, violence, profanity, people treating one another horribly, sin being exalted. It's not like I never considered these things before, but I became so desensitized to it that I was unaware. That is how Satan packages it for us here in the States. We don't even know he is there. Furthermore, some brilliant sitcom writers have figured out how to make people's tragic and unhealthy relationships comical. Now I know some of you reading this are thinking I am crazy and you are probably calling me an extremest, and what I have to say to you is...come and love on some orphans for a few weeks and see how it changes you. The comforts and luxuries of our world harmfully blind us to the dangers of it.

I am praying that God would give me the strength to make even small everyday decisions that would honor and glorify Him, like leaving the TV off. I am praying that He would cause me to be more vulnerable in my community and that we would live together as He has called us to live together...supporting, encouraging, correcting and advising one another in wisdom. And this is just the beginning.

The good news is, HE is good and holy, and He has mine (and your) bests interests as His priority. I truly hope that you are experiencing God in a new way today too, and if you are not I hope you will ask me to pray for you. The life He wants to offer you is so much better and sweeter than anything you could concoct yourself!

Soon I will be working on a video and some other exciting info on what Family Legacy has planned, so be on the lookout for a few more posts full of fun!

Winding Down

Muli Bwanji (How are you)? I think this will be my final post from Zambia, oh it's a sad day. The summer has been amazing, challenging, exhausting, joyful, and I have seen the Lord work in amazing ways!

Friday was an extremely emotional day for me as I had to say goodbye to some of my dear Zambian friends. Many tears were shed on both sides for the loss that we will all feel as we have to go our seperate ways...for now. Our amazing Zambians circled around us and sang for us in their native language and then prayed for us. I was not able to video because my memory card was full, but I hope to attain some videos from my friends and be able to share it with you. The manner in which they pray and sing is unlike anything you have ever witnessed!

These last two weeks were alot of fun, as some of my friends John, Paul and Kent from Austin joined me in Zambia! All of them now know why I love Zambia so much and why I hate leaving this beautiful place! It was neat to witness their experiences and how God touched each of their lives. John had the opportunity to go with his group of kids and his partner(Isaac) to a witch doctor's house and share the gospel. This witch doctor actually turned away business while the group was sharing with him. He and his wife both accepted Christ and Isaac explained to them that in Christ you are a new creation, and the old has gone. Therefore, you cannot go on living the way you are living, you are no longer able to be a witch doctor who curses people. I think it was hard for the man to accept, but they prayed that this man would not have peace within himself until he destroyed all of his charms and found another way to make money for his family. The couple was very happy.

I wish that you all could be here to witness the work that God is doing. In America, we are too obstinate and to quick to explain things away with our vast intellect. But the gospel cannot be dismissed with intellect, and it is not for those with obstinate hearts. I have really been feeling burdened for my own country as I prepare to come home. Burdened that we have too many other things to do besides share the joy and love of Christ, burdened that we have too many people unwilling to hear the message of Christ, or who think they are above God.
For how can we who were created be wiser or smarter than He who created us? I wish people at home were just as hungry for the word of God as people here in Zambia, but we as Americans just fill that hunger with stuff. One more ipod, one more iphone, one more flat screen plasma...Just some food for thought.

Last week I heard a story of a girl who said that her father had not hugged her, loved her, talked to her in many years. She went home one day after camp and was able to shared with her father that in Christ he was loved, and that he was accepted into God's family. That he was secure in his salvation, and that he could walk victoriously and free in Christ. The man actually started crying, picked up his daughter, hugged her and told her thank you! That is the power of Christ. That relationships can be healed and reconciled, that God has the power to change a life in an instant! I am so glad that I have had the opportunity to witness change after change after change! I truly am blessed to be a witness!

I also had the opportunity to see my second school of girls this week, as they came to camp. Their school is called Hope and Faith. Again, I was tackled with hugs the minute they spotted me, and Mumbi kept saying to Memory "I told you auntie Stephanie would be here, I told you she would come, I told you!" It made me smile and even though I did not have a small group this week, I was able to sit in on their small group a couple of times and we all liked that very much. Sadly, I will not see them next year at camp because they will be in grade 8, and community schools only go to grade 7. Perhaps I will have to make a special trip to visit them.

I am hoping to follow up with my Destiny school children next week before I leave. These kids touch my heart in a special way, and I almost can't bear to leave them. I know the Lord has plans for me at home, and I only pray that I will be faithful to proceed forth with them. As always, I love you all and can't wait to tell you about everything when I get home! Zi como muzanga wangas (thank you my friends)!